This text came to me via e-mail. Original author is unknown.
ENGLISH IS EASY
So what is this stuff about English being easy?
There is a two-letter word that perhaps has more meaning than any other two-letter word, and that is "UP."
It's easy to understand UP, meaning toward the sky or at the top of the list, but when we waken in the morning, why do we wake UP?
Sometimes the little word has really special meaning. At other times this UP is just plain confusing.
* At a meeting, why does a topic come UP? Why do we speak UP and why are the officers UP for election and why is it UP to the secretary to write UP A report?
* We call UP our friends.
* We use brighten UP a room, polish UP the silver, warm UP the leftovers, and clean UP the kitchen. We lock UP the house, and some guys fix UP the old car.
* People stir UP trouble, line UP for tickets, work UP an appetite, and think UP excuses.
* To be dressed is one thing but to be dressed UP is special.
* A drain must be opened UP because it is stopped UP.
* We open UP a store in the morning, but we close it UP at night.
* When it threatens to rain, we say it is clouding UP. When the sun comes out we say it is clearing UP.
* When it rains, it wets UP the earth. When it doesn't rain for a while, things dry UP.
We seem to be pretty mixed UP about UP!
To be knowledgeable of the proper uses of UP, look UP the word in the dictionary. In a desk-size dictionary, the word up, takes UP almost 1/4th the page and definitions add UP to about 30.
If you are UP to it, you might try building UP a list of the many ways UP is used. It will take UP a lot of your time, but if you don't give UP, you may wind UP with 100 or more.
One could go on and on, but I'll wrap it UP, for now my time is UP, so.............
I'll shut UP .....!
Anybody else got a headache now?