Tuesday, April 05, 2005

Elena's World

Yes, folks, I am alive. I'm still writing. I'm still as cute, funny, and well heeled as ever. Thanks for missin' me!

I've been a leetle behind at work and now have caught up (mostly), even turning in an assignment over a week early. Woohoo!

Finally saw Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason. Movie review forthcoming. Also saw The Incredibles. Fantastic flick. Again, complete review forthcoming.

Roller coaster blood sugar levels lately. Ick. That's what being on shots will do for you. That and not dosing at the proper times.

Spring is finally here in Music City. Beautiful green everywhere... The pear trees are dressed in their white April finery. The redbud trees are pinked up. Daffodils are smiling their sunny selves at blue skies. Violets peak out from under the grass blades. Birds are chirping. Insects are tuning up, preparing for summer. (I predict it's gonna be a scorcher this year. Thank goodness, no cicadas are due to arrive. Those things are nasty.)

You haven't had a good traffic rant from me in a while. Well, my local friends have had to endure my rants. Here's a guide to driving in Music City:
* Turn signals are good things. Use them when preparing to turn or change lanes. Turn signals: they look good on you.
* Merge early. I think that TDOT actually is running a campaign with this idea. Folks, you have nothing to prove by riding out the white line on the right till the lane peters out. If you are familiar with the particular section of the interstate, GET OVER AS SOON AS POSSIBLE! And do use your signal. Which brings us to...
* Use your signal! (I can't repeat this one enough.) If you will signal, I'll let you in front of me, or I'll speed up so's you can get behind me.
* If I'm signaling, let me in! It's one thing if it's a plain stretch o' road with nary an exit in sight, but when I'm trying to get to the exit I need, LET ME IN, ya moron!
* Note: It does not insult your manhood or womanhood to have people be in front of you on the road. It proves nothing for you to be ahead of the pack. Now, I do understand if you are hurrying to get a good parking spot. Goodness knows, parking downtown is at a premium. Just don't run over or clip other drivers' cars in your morning rush, please.
* If it's raining, please don't abandon your senses and drive way over the speed limit or way under. Drive cautiously, yes. Drive smartly, yes. Not stupidly.
* If you know how to drive in snow, please volunteer your transportation services to those of us who don't know how or who tremble in fear at the mention of the dreaded four-letter winter precipitation word. Better yet, teach someone how to drive on snow and ice.
* If it is overcast, raining, snowing, or foggy, please use your headlights appropriately.
* If your headlamp(s) go out, go get new ones. Conveniently available in the motor supplies section at your local Wal-Mart. And don't tell me you don't have a Wal-Mart. They're everywhere. Everyone has one. So anyway, don't blind people by driving with your brights on.
* Don't tailgate. It's rude. And can be dangerous.
* NO rubbernecking. If the accident victims or pulled-over vehicle(s) are not actually IN your lane, don't slow down. Who cares that the car was on fire? Who cares that you can see the blood all over the stretcher? Say a prayer as you pass by, and go the speed limit! Provided some igmo in front of you is not slowed down....if he or she is, then yeah, you gotta slow down. But don't cause other people to be late merely to satisfy your curiosity.
* No weaving and stopping for no reason.

Heh... *thuds to a stop* That's all I can think of for right now. More posts later as inspiration strikes!


Nate said...

Elena.. we've been over this... its not a turn signal. It's a passing signal. it tells people which side to pass you on.

The left arrow tells them to pass on left. The right, on the right.

Elena said...

Turn signal, passing signal.....whatever. I'm just saying, "INDICATE!" I'm not a mind reader.

Thanks for taking time out from your young'uns to visit!

Anonymous said...

agree w/ the traffic rants I have 1 more to add:

The entire population of Murfreesboro and probably Nashville as well need to review the 4 way stop sign section of the driver's handbook. It's really not hard.

about spring sprouting:

How does one deter little birdies from making a home in one's window A/C unit. They like to wake me up at 6 am.

To landlords everywhere, when you plant bulbs along a sidewalk, make sure the rows are the same length or else they start sprouting the plants look whoppy-jod, reminiscent of a diagram of the Y chromosome.

bikepaths: it's lovely to ride one's bike in the spring, but its suck's when said bikepath winds past Dodge's Fried Chicken and sewage from local businesses. Nothing like a good whiff of grease and pooh in the springtime.

Wes said...

I love it when someone makes a point of passing you, only to remain one car-length in front of you for the next few miles. It accomplishes so much!

BTW, my nephew just loaned me The Incredibles. Looking forward to seeing it.

Flicka Spumoni said...

Is this the same Elena of "Cozy-Cup-A-Corner" the poetic spiritualist?

I enjoy your poetry, if it is. If it isn't, I've enjoyed your comments over at Cowboy's and Arielle's.


Elena said...

Flicka, yes, I'm the same Elena. :o) Thanks for the compliments.

How are the snags with the text not formatting how you want on your blog? Getting any better?

(BTW---The word spiritualist has that whole gazing into a crystal ball/reading Tarot cards connotation. I'm sensing that "a Christian who writes poetry, often on spiritual themes" is what you meant. *kind smile*)